Tuesday, August 01, 2006

I Killed Video! But Do I Look Good?!

I've got lots and lots of awesome stories. Here's my story of the hottest fucking thing I've seen in a month.
Yesterday I was in American Apparel on Robertson, flirting with the hollywood / brentwood retail girls and hunting down the Photo Issue of VICE magazine and i decided to try on some shirts & stuff. I found a totally fetch Kelly Green california hoodie that looked pretty smart, I think, and was walking out of the dressing room with an enhanced feeling of self worth when I saw the most ridiculously fucking hot girl standing in the dressing room corridor, wearing nothing but an army green jersey invisi-thong bottom and a coked out glaze. She posed for her girl friend. "Does this make me look skinny?" "You look fucking hot!" Yes. There's something incredibly square about acting as cool as I did - like it would have been way legit to just start giggling like a schoolgirl and blowing kisses at her perfectly tanned, teardrop-shaped boobs. Whatevs. Hottest fucking thing this summer!

Que Onda MTV?! I <3 You! The best record of the 1980s came from the Hollywood Rose + The L.A. Guns (along with the best artwork, illustrated by Robert Williams), but it MTV let these punks tear shit up with Stephanie Seymour and a Steinway! Rock The Cradle Of Love is probably the most memorable music video of my childhood (thanks betsy lynn!), but I've got too many favorites to count. Homo Romantics hate on MTV for getting commercial, but it was born to The Buggles, so lay off haters! I mean Tabitha Soren wasn't exactly Anderson Cooper, but really, who is? (she did, however, win a Peabody for her 1992 Choose Or Lose series). The Real World changed television forever, and those music videos that you claim they don't play have are probably the single greatest influence on modern cinema (for better or worse), from editing and pacing, to colour and cinematography, they have changed they are the bleeding edge of [popular] motion pictures, and with them MTV has changed the way we absorb media. So on this, the 25th Anniversary of MTV, I can proudly say.... i think I kinda have a thing for Heidi! I mean, seriously, she's A - Dorable!. For those about to rock...


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